San Andreas was the biggest GTA game ever when it came out. We had a huge world to explore and so much cool stuff to do that we couldn’t do in previous Grand Theft Auto games. Along with all the cool stuff there was a lot of stupid things that we did. Here are the 12 stupid things you did when playing GTA San Andreas.

Jumping off a building with a parachute and opening it too late.

Parachutes were something totally new in this game, so it was natural that we would be excited to use them as much as possible. Unfortunately it was quite difficult at the start to get the hang of using them. Often when jumping off a building the CJ would fall a lot faster than anticipated and before you knew what was happening it was too late to open the parachute to be able to safely land on the ground without feeling the splat.

Your plane gets blown up by a tree that didn’t load into memory quick enough

This may not have been an issue on the PC, but it sure as hell was on the PS2! Flying around in a jet would result in the consoles processor being unable to keep up with you. This generated lag when loading up the environment. When flying around the outback it was common for a giant ass tree to suddenly teleport right in front of you which results in the plane exploding. Why not fly a bit higher to avoid this?? NEVER!!!!

Trying to land the giant airliner in the desert air strip

This airstrip was awesome! It was a kick ass base of operations for you to kick back which eventually contained a jetpack outside the door if you got that far. The airport in Los Venturas had a giant airline jet in one of the hangars. Once you got the hang of flying this jet it was natural that you would try and land it on the airstrip. By land it usually means half land and then crash into the hanger, hoping that the plane didn’t explode.

Trying to go down Mount Chiliad on a mountain bike…and failing miserably

Getting to the top of Mount Chiliad was the first time I saw a mountain bike, so naturally I ditched my car and jumped on top of the bike. Since it’s a mountain bike you would expect the bike to be able to handle the mountainous terrain, but sadly this was not the case. Within about 2 seconds CJ had gone over the handlebars after bumping into the first twig or pebble that hit the bikes front tyre. Not only do you have to deal with the disappointment of the bike being shit, but you are now left on the side of the mountain with no transport while the bike continues to tumble down the mountain.

Search for one of the “Easter Eggs” that didn’t actually exist!

This map was like the holy grail of San Andreas!

Rumors told us that the markers on this map were markers for easter eggs, but not just any old easter eggs. One was meant to be where big foot lived in the woods, another was where you got abducted by aliens. They pretty much covered anything mysterious and were all a load of crap! Changing the date on the PS2 involved quitting the game and going to the menu then reloading the game. Having to do this over and over for different dates hoping the aliens would show up if you played the game on a specific date. Joke was on us for falling for it.

Derailed a train

Lets rob a train and go flat out to see how fast this bad boy can go, then freak out when the thing falls off the tracks. Who reads in game hints and tips anyway!

Crashed into a river that doesn’t have a low bank

Ignoring the roads was almost a rule of thumb when driving across the countryside. Unfortunately this sometimes resulted in you crashing into a river. Some might say this isn’t a big deal since CJ can swim, but sometimes these rivers don’t have a low bank allowing you to climb out. Spending 10 minutes swimming down a river to find the shore was a pain in the ass, no matter how many oysters you found.

Daisy chained tractors

I think every gamer had this eureka moment. Accidentally figuring out you could hitch cars to the back of a tractor with the little Hydraulic arm. It was great fun hitching innocent drivers cars and dumping the car off in the river, then finally the moment you realise you can hitch multiple tractors together to make a TRACTOR SNAKE! This idea lasted about 3 minutes at which point you realise that 1, its hard to find loads of tractors at once 2, tractors at the end freak the fuck out when you try to drive 3, other drivers are dickheads and always crash into the chain flipping tractors over. This almost always ended in a set of domino explosions as one tractor after another blew up.

Got the double ended dildo from the cop station

This is funny enough on it’s own, the fact that you get it in the showers at the cop station is the icing on the cake.

Crammed more the the standard number of cars into a garage

This was the definition of GTA first world problems. You have too many kick ass cars and not enough garage space. By default most garages allow 2 cars, but if you cram one car under the garage door, you can squeeze as many cars as you can fit. This was cool since we had the cars to keep and show off to friends…until the dreaded day you open the garage and some of the cars have vanished!

Despised any missions that involved remote control vehicles

Whether it was the missions where you were in control of the vehicle or you were on the rooftop trying to shoot them down with the mini gun. The general opinion was “fuck these missions!”.

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